5 Ideas for When Christmas Doesn’t Feel Merry

When Christmas doesn’t feel merry, this time of year is hard. Christmas can be difficult for people even in otherwise good years. Blue Christmas church services, usually held on December 21, the longest night of the year, are an opportunity for people feeling loss or feeling lost in the holiday season to gather and acknowledge the struggle to stay afloat when everyone else seems to be having a jolly old time.

We have a five old time vintage-inspired ideas to help lift your mood. As a person with depression, I know  these ideas are not a replacement for counseling and in my case, proper medication. But if you have the Christmas blues, if this Christmas doesn’t feel merry, these ideas might be helpful.

Crank the music, sing and dance

Christmas doesn't feel merry

Find some music you like, crank up the volume, sing with all your heart and bust a few moves. You don’t have to sing on key and you don’t have to be Ginger Rogers or Taylor Swift. You are not being scored. Moving your feet and singing releases endorphins. Don’t feel self conscious, let yourself go. If you are looking for free playlists, try apps like Spotify and Pandora. Or put an album on the turntable and rock around your house.

Bake something

The creative act of baking can elevate your mood. Mixing and measuring, sifting and rolling feel good. The scent of something delicious in the oven can be nostalgic and reassuring. Sharing what you made with others, perhaps someone who won’t be expecting it, definitely elevates your mood.

Take a Christmas lights tour

If you’re not feeling motivated to decorate yourself, fill your travel cup with hot chocolate, play music or a podcast you love and take a drive around your town to admire homemade light displays. There is equal beauty in a low key display of candles in windows and a high octane display that leaves no quadrant of the house without illumination. If you live in a city or town center, bundle up and take a walk instead. Christmas lights can trigger memories that in turn release dopamine, a happy hormone.

Escape into a holiday movie

Christmas doesn't seem merry

Skip the news channels and tune into a holiday movie. It can be a classic like It’s a Wonderful Life, A Christmas Story or National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. Or try something that it you might not typically think of like Meet Me in St. Louis or Christmas in Connecticut. If you aren’t feeling the vintage movie spirit, go ahead and wallow in a Hallmark Christmas movie marathon.

Write a letter

Christmas doesn't feel merry

Sit down at your laptop or get out a real pen and real paper and write a few Christmas letters. Write about things you did, things you missed doing and things you are looking forward to doing. Stay away from social media. No one posts about the warts and bruises of their holiday, they focus on how lovely they are. Writing letters may be something you haven’t done for a while and it will feel good.


If Christmas doesn’t feel merry to you this year, you are not alone. These ideas might make you spark at least a little joy, they have worked for me, particularly the singing and dancing. (FYI, I am not gifted in either department but that doesn’t diminish how much doing both lift my mood.) We’re all doing our best to find the happy in this holiday season. Trying something a little bit vintage might help jingle your bells.

If you are in despair and need immediate help, here are some resources. Don’t wait to call.

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